We all share certain bonds with certain people. And friendship is such a bond where we find a mutual affection with someone irrespective of race, colour, and gender. Ever got a person with whom you eat, drink, sleep, travel and you even took breath together?? Have you ever made a bond with someone where, from a total absolute stranger to an acquaintance, to friend, to best friend, to intimate, close friend and ended up in a confusion about what next. When it comes to friendship between members of opposite sex we look upon norms we have been believing all these years. Yes, that’s what we have been grown up to. We grew up watching Monica and Chandler from Friends, Rahul and Anjali from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai (1998), Aditi and Jai from Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na (2008), Sona and Aby from Niram (1999) where friendships took a romantic turn. And we believed love is indeed friendship as in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai Shahrukh says “ Pyaar Dosti hai” “love is friendship” and made us fall for that classic dialogue.
All these taught us men and women can never be ‘just friends’. But do we really have to follow this or was this simply made up for some timeless romantic comedies and for those all-time blockbusters? Have you ever noticed the same on screen celebrities off screen? The same SRK – Kajol who shares the best chemistry on-screen gives many friendship goals off-screen with their strong bond. It’s said that they have always respected each other and helped during shoots. But coming up to any series or films, most of the lead male and female characters can be seen ending up in love from the bond of friends. And now if it didn’t happen, we hesitate to accept that because we expect that men and women are always on the road to romance. There are very few plots even to describe the other.
Yes it is natural to fall for the one who know you better than you know yourself than to fall for some absolute stranger. So if you fell for them it’s completely fine and normal same as if you don’t. It’s not necessary that all friendships to end up in love. And that is what ‘platonic friendships’ is all about. Platonic friendship is the friendship with no romantic element between the friends of opposite sex. Basically it will be without any sexual engagement, again it can be of same sex too. Platonic friends can provide love, care, support, a friendship that is healthy and deep .You just have to understand the boundaries and stick with them in thick and thin. And then you will see how beneficial it can be.
Psychology today interviewed Linda Sapadin, a psychologist from Valley Stream, New York, about platonic relationship and whether men and women can ever be ‘just friends’. She believes that men and women can be ‘just friends’ and the idea of them solely hanging out together with romantic intentions dates back to when women stayed home while men went out to work. The only reason for women to meet men back then was for romance. “Now they work together and share sports together” they can make friends. Its said that friends who are attracted to each other may recognize that qualities they tolerate in a friendship wouldn’t necessarily work in a serious romantic relationship. “If sex is part of dynamic, addressing it explicitly is the best strategy” for making sure the friendship survives, says Kathy Werking, at Eastern Kentucky University and author of We’re Just Good Friends. You can be attracted to your friend but beware that ‘attraction’ shouldn’t be the definition for your relationship. It’s the hormones that led to that attraction and you are more than your hormones, says Sapadin. But the moment one of them feel the attraction, there it stops being platonic. While these relationships do not work out successful for many, there are many for whom it came out successful.
Can a man and woman really be just friends? If a man and woman are friendly more than just friends then why can’t they just date or get romantic? Dealing with these doubters is a challenge that can’t be ignored. Today a cultural shift have come up where people keep their sexual involvement and friendships separate. It is another whole topic to discuss about ‘until when’ because obstacles in this kind of relations are many other than getting attracted to each other. Just know friendship between men and women is not impossible.
So how about giving a try to platonic friendship? And let’s give our future generation more opportunities than us to socialize and to celebrate life.
Truth is something that can be proven right or what obliges with the facts. But Human Mind is beyond facts, for us truth is what we believe as truth, what we accept and follow. We often counsel ourselves with a lie because the truth is simply harder to accept. But somewhere deep down WE are responsible for the truth being soo bad that we start lying to ourselves.
Human emotions are very complicated in nature. It is hard to come to terms with them. So we often start running away from them. But running is no solution, you must have a conversation with yourself about what all went south and why did it happen as it happened. Until you confess your sins to yourself you won’t be able to move forward with your life. All the struggles you face in your life to achieve worldly pleasure will no more give you satisfaction or happiness. It will all go in vain!
Once we accept a lie as the truth and start preaching it, we deep down know that what we are preaching or telling people is a lie and that’s the time we lose faith in ourselves. And faith my mates is the only thing that matters the most because even if you earn every beings’ faith on the face of earth it won’t matter, the only person that matters is YOU. Unless and until you don’t accept who you are, you will never feel proud of yourself. The minute you trust your actions, PRIDE will hold your head high for others to kneel at you.
Many a times people don’t lie for their wrong deeds, instead they blame things or circumstances for their mistakes. But it is only fair to take responsibility for our share of actions. “Blame is just another futile way of lying to yourself”. And then time comes when we have to accept it but this time it is just by the far more harder way. We have to stop giving reasons and accept what is right infront of us. We have to stop unseeing things because seeing is hard to digest, IT IS WHAT IT IS.
Gautama Buddha one of the world’s wisest spiritual leader once met a young woman she was cursing everyone for her son being dead, her only light of eyes. She wasn’t accepting the fact that her son is dead. She was pleading everyone there mourning, to stop mourning and help her son to wake up. Everyone was speechless and were looking at her with pity in their eyes. Then she saw Gautama Buddha and went weeping and groaning with the dead son in her arms, compassionately she asked if he had a solution. He thought for a moment and asked her to bring five mustard seeds from any family in which there has never been a death. Young women again filled with hope wandered every family in the village searching for those mustard seeds. But she couldn’t find a single family who hadn’t witnessed the painful departure of their loved ones. She then understood what the Buddha wanted her to find out.” Suffering is a part of life and death is inevitable”. She then stopped grieving and handed over the body to the priest.
Now we saw how she could only move on with her life after accepting the truth. If we hold onto the things that went wrong then life will also hold onto us. It will eat you up.” Accepting the truth might be as hard as conquering a mountain, but right now it is not the mountain we are conquering, it is ourselves.”
Here is the love, you are searching for!!!
Are you tired of searching for your dream love? Started to stop believing in love anyone? You desperately haunted for true love but failed to find it, then just tried to seek for the last time.
Want to know where? Go in front of a mirror; now look in the mirror at the person you see in the mirror who knows what kind of love you are searching for. Only you know, who you are, what you want because only you were there with you at your adversity when no one else was. The only person who stayed with you perpetually was the person you. Person, this is the perfect match. Love the person in the mirror, that’s no one else but you.
If you are trying to search for someone to love or someone who can love you, I am sorry to say but you might not be able to love someone unless and until you know how to love yourself.
If you want love, start giving love to you. Maybe no one could love you the way you can love. Start loving you and people will follow you. Remember the way you treat yourself you reflect others to treat you similarly, because if you cannot accept and love yourself how could you imagine someone else to love you
If you want to love someone, first learn to love yourself. You can never love others if you don’t know how to love yourself. Start loving you and you will spread love all around you.
How can I love myself?
It’s easy and simple. Ask this question to yourself: – What I would have wanted from my lover?
Didn’t have your answer yet? First and foremost, time. Begin the journey to love yourself by giving more time to you. Go on dates with yourself, go for long walks, and long drives with your own company. Enjoy your own company, admire yourself. The more you will give time to yourself the more you will understand yourself. Dress the way you like, start doing things you always wanted to do, give gifts to yourself, dedicate songs to yourself. Do each and everything for you which you always wanted someone else to do for you. Show how much you can love someone. Careless what others will think, and do more which makes you more you. Think about you, your health, your soul, your body. Self-love should always be the priority. Be authentic, be you!!!
Now, if you truly started loving yourself, a different glow will be shown on your face. You will start radiating positive vibes because you finally have the love you were searching for.
Once you learn to give love to yourself you will sparkle with happiness. The happier you will be the more happiness and love you could sprinkle wherever you go. You will start attracting positive things and maybe a different lover too. People will start loving you because of your loving vibes and nature because giving love to yourself and others makes you a beautiful soul. You will pick yourself up whenever you fall, you will encourage yourself to give your best, appreciate achievement, and rebuke when something went wrong. These little things will take you to meet the best version of you because love brings out the best in you. Stop imagining and start living your imagination of love by self-love.
Stop chasing to find love in others and start finding love in you. Stop waiting for love and start loving the person with whom you were always living with. Self-love, self-acceptance isn’t important it is necessary, even if that makes people call you selfish. Love is beautiful and so the lover.
Next baba ka Dhaba video went viral on the internet. Recently another video, kanji bada wale of a 90 years old uncle gained a lot of popularity through social media.
Similar to baba ka Dhaba in Delhi, due to coronavirus pandemic his earning suffered a lot. His stall is in the professors colony, Kamla Nagar, Agra, near Desire Bakery.
Dhanishtha, a food blogger posted a video of Agar’s baba ka Dhaba and requested her followers to support her on Instagram having a username as a_tastetour. She received a lot of appreciation from social media. The video has crossed 291,522 views, 930 comments, and more than 60,600 likes on Instagram. Kanji bada wale has been selling kanji bada for almost 40 years. His earnings had come down to₹250-₹300 in a day because of Covid-19, just before his clip got viral.
After the video went viral people started coming to Kanji bada wale to support him and to help him to come out of his bad times.
Her small initiative has helped the uncle a lot.
The way Baba ka Dhaba in Malviya Nagar, New Delhi received love from people, kanji bada is too receiving love from people.
The power of social media has truly shown that humanity still exists and together we all can bring happiness to people in need.
Now, baba ka Dhaba is living a better life. The tears on baba’s face have changed to a big bright smile.
The incident of Baba ka Dhaba and kanji bada has put up light on local vendors in India.
There are many baba ka Dhaba in India waiting to be recognized like baba ka Dhaba.
Corona Virus made us see many unpleasant things but we cannot neglect the amusing side of coronavirus.
2020 has shown us many incidents which proved the famous quote by Mattie Stepanek, “Unity is strength… when there is teamwork and collaboration, wonderful things can be achieved.”
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